Inspiration for the New Year

I was thinking of giving up drinking this month. Not for ever, you understand; just for a few weeks, maybe a month or two.

But then.... I was reminded of this old English pub favourite (my brother used to have it on his bedroom wall!), and I thought, Why bother?



The horse and cow live thirty years,
And nothing know of wines and beers.
The goat and sheep at twenty die,
And never taste of Scotch or rye.
The sow drinks water by the ton,
And at eighteen is nearly done.
The dog at fifteen cashes in,
Without the aid of rum or gin.
The cat in milk and water soaks,
And then at twelve short years it croaks.
The modest, sober bone dry hen
Lays eggs for years, then dies at ten.
All animals are strictly dry;
They sinless live and quickly die.
But sinful, ginful, rum-soaked men
Survive for three score years and ten;
And some of us, the mighty few,
Stay pickled till we're ninety-two!

Anon