For any new readers who may stumble in here after I called 'last orders' on new posts, this will be the place to start: a sampler of my very best posts from six years of blogging about booze and bars and Life's related complications.
Some ideas for China-themed computer games that can be played at the urinal (the Japanese have already developed the technology platform!).
My evening's entertainment choices - viewed as a horse race.
My key theory on romantic relationships (not that's it's ever done me much good, I must confess).
The relative merits of whisky, wine, and beer - summed up in seventeen syllables.
I recall the chat-up philosophy of a guy I used to know at university. I'm not sure that it would ever work, but it is an intriguing approach to the problem.
I outline the secret of my success at trivia quizzes.
I complain that alcohol in Beijing is becoming seriously overpriced, prohibitively so.
A romantic reconnaissance by proxy - no good could ever come of it!
I am sceptical about a suggestion that the Russians have a word for the emotion you feel for a former lover... but I reflect on the possible usefulness of such a concept.
I have some strong opinions on the issue of stag parties.
Some prime examples of the bizarre, surreal conversations that my friends and I seem to get into by SMS. 'Nanobots can knit!' is one of my favourite lines ever.
One of my 'Weekly bons mots', on China's national drink.
I am surprised to re-encounter an 'old flame' from my early days in Beijing.
The strange story of my 'trick leg'.
A heartsick haiku on the most dispiriting of the many abortive romances I've suffered in China.
A favourite anecdote from what was probably my most bibulous holiday ever.
I find myself comparing my relationships with bars to relationships with women (a metaphor I have returned to).
A fun reader participation thread, celebrating the blog's 5th anniversary.
For some reason, this post regularly draws more search engine traffic than the rest of the blog combined.
One of my most shaming, but undeniably amusing, recollections of my time at university - culminating in an utterly brilliant punchline from a disgruntled service worker.
Another of my haiku, this time on the curious appeal of the bar crawl.
Fighter pilot etiquette applied to helping out your buddies in the pursuit of women.
I launch a quixotic campaign against Beijing's most commonplace - and most awful - beer.
One of my favourite nights in China (but it happened a long, long time ago, in May 1994).
What I thought of the big parade celebrating the 60th anniversary of the founding of the PRC a few years ago. (I found it unexpectedly hilarious.)
I show off my Latin with a brief discussion of Virgil's Aeneid, and a poem of my own inspired by a famous episode in it.
The wittily contrarian A.A. Gill inspires me to see just how environmentally unfriendly I can be.
Nearly 20 years of accumulated wisdom on the subject of how to deal with the competitive toasting that invariably breaks out during a Chinese banquet.
I don my satirical cap to describe the typical life-cycle of a small bar in Beijing.
Time to reintroduce some liberating randomness into my life!
Froog gets philosophical....