Montezuma's

We in the Gulou neighbourhood have been rather excited - perhaps excessively, recklessly, obsessively excited - to have a Mexican restaurant,  Amigo, open up in our midst over the summer.  In recent weeks, I have found myself heading over there at least once a week (whenever I fancy something a bit more filling, or a bit more subtly spicy than most Chinese fare).  Even when I attempt to restrain my own enthusiasm for this satisfyingly stodgy and piquant cuisine, I find friends of mine encouraging me to meet them there.  A number of Americans I know have been especially laudatory, suggesting that it is the best Mexican place in Beijing (although this is not high praise; scarcely praise at all, in fact). There do appear to be one or two actual Mexicans involved in setting the place up: previously unheard of touches of 'authenticity' include sombreros on the wall, mariachi classics blaring over the speakers, a margarita that has discernible tequila to it (and a proper edge of sourness, rather than just the cloying sweetness we find in most Beijing offerings of the classic cocktail), and a trio of relishes (including an especially tasty salsa verde) offered as a free accompaniment to every meal or snack.  The "all beers 10rmb after 10pm" offer could well make this the area's premier late-night snacking option. However, the staff all appear to be Chinese - and thus not particularly familiar with the cuisine.... or with the concepts of quality control or hygiene.  I have had wildly varying experiences there with the food (the rice, alas, is invariably dry as a crisp, suggesting that it has been reheated in a microwave multiple times).  I have a nasty suspicion that most of the 'cooking' takes place under a hot lamp or in a microwave - often for inadequate periods of time; and sometimes, I fear, more than once.  The tortillas are often tepid, if not cold; while other elements of the dish may seem fiercely hot at first, but are not well heated through or cool down very quickly. These are conspicuous warning indicators of likely intestinal distress the next day. And today the last emperor of the Aztecs is indeed driving the hot vengeance of his spearpoint into my tender bowels. You have been warned. Although, of course, I'll almost certainly be back there in a few days to try my luck again.  I mean, you build up a resistance after a while, don't you?