Tuesday, October 11, 2011

The home stretch

Like a long-distance run, a long spell off booze becomes more wearing - mentally as much as physically - towards the end.

I've overcome the metabolic readjustments: no more poor sleeping or afternoon sugar crashes. I'm not getting any cravings any more. Well, I never did, really; but in the first couple of weeks, it's a struggle to get over the habituation - the ingrained expectation that every time you go out, every time you go into a bar or restaurant, you are going to order an alcoholic drink (it happens without you even thinking about it!). I've now got used to staying in a lot more, and to making a tonic water or a Virgin Mary last me for a good long while when I do go out.

And I've proven the point, dammit. Yes, I can go without drink - quite easily. No, I'm not addicted. Yes, I can resist even the most insistent and insidious and tempting temptations.

Having surmounted all these hurdles, ticked off all these achievements, you tend to start asking yourself, What is the point? Why must I persist for this arbitrary number of days? Why does a fatuous promise to myself have such power over me?

Big question. It just does, all right?

This is my twentieth day without a drink. After today, I only have eight more left.

Next Thursday will get messy. But do not try to sway me from my path before then.

1 comment:

Ruby said...

Yay, good for you Froog! The real test is when you finish the 4 weeks of abstinence, what then? Do you go back to the old routine, or has this shown you that you can go out and have fun without having a drink or 10?

Since I finish my month off (for charity!) I've pretty much stopped drinking during the week, my wallet and waistline are much happier for it. Yes, I'm still prone to having a big night in the weekend, when I can sleep in and recover, but it's more of a planned occasion (for example, open bar at my local) than just another night out.

Looking forward to celebrating with you and buying you a whiskey next week!