A bar owner acquaintance of mine several years ago introduced me to this antidote to seasonal jollity, a song called Christmas Sucks, ostensibly by Tom Waits and Peter Murphy of Bauhaus. I mentioned this way back in the early days of the blog; but I couldn't find audio or video to embed back then, so just reprinted the lyrics. Now that everything is on YouTube (perhaps the only progress the world has seen in the last five years), I can finally let you hear the song.
But - shock, horror! - I discover that it's not really Tom and Peter after all. The song is by a band called Porn Orchard (GREAT band name!): Murphy is impersonated by their vocalist Ted Hafer, and Waits by guitarist Curtiss Pernice.
The bottle is empty. The sleigh has a flat.
The stripper in my bed is ugly and fat.
Great stuff!
But just in case fake Tom is not good enough for you, here's the real thing: a vintage performance from the 1970s - Silent Night and Christmas Card From A Hooker In Minneapolis. [I posted this once before, but it bears repeating.]
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