Thursday, December 27, 2007

The incredible disappearing Pharmacy....

.... and the dashed elusive Xiao He.

I think I have omitted to mention this on here thus far, but the Glorious Pharmacy gig I had been looking forward to at the end of last month failed to occur. I have complained before that Pharmacy gigs have quite often been advertised over the past 18 months, but never in fact seem to happen. I wonder if this is mainly down to the erratic personality of Xiao He - their leading light, but these days mostly a solo performer; and his solo gigs always have this will-he-turn-up-this-time-or-won't-he? tension hanging over them too. He is quite The Scarlet Pimpernel of the Beijing music scene.

Then again, maybe I shouldn't blame Xiao He. A lot of it is probably down to the venues, most of whom will, I suspect, advertise a 'confirmed gig' on the basis of the merest drunken half-promise (or even as an unfounded, shameless deception, to try to lure in punters on what would otherwise be a slow night). Jiangjinjiu (or 3J, as it has become known in text-speak) seems to be particularly bad in this respect. I think probably at least half of the things I've gone there to see haven't taken place. I really should get into the habit of phoning first for last-minute reassurance, but..... well, frankly, my Chinese just isn't up to it; and even if it were, I'm not sure that I'd put much trust in whatever I was told. No, you just have to turn up, with a large measure of hope in your heart - and a readiness to be disappointed, a willingness to forgive.

Tulsa had assured me that Xiao He was supposed to be playing at 3J on Christmas Night. I was extremely sceptical, but..... I do love the guy, and I hadn't seen him for a while..... so, I dragged The Chairman along to see if he would show or not.

He didn't show. But The Chairman and I were sufficiently lubricated with White Russians by that point to 'enjoy' the performers who were there anyway. Not 'enjoy' in the musically elated sense that I have so often experienced there in the past, though. No, this was more revelling in how bad something could be - and griping from the sidelines like Statler & Waldorf.

The first guy up was an intimdatingly burly character, with a thin moustache and a bullet-head - but nearly all his songs were slow and angsty, a string of indistinguishable, plodding lamentations, oddly out of keeping with his daunting physical presence. "Strong but sensitive," I observed. "He looks like a male nurse...... from a psychiatric hospital. He's probably singing about how all his girlfriends have left him because he's such a whiny bitch. Not that I'd ever call him 'a whiny bitch' to his face, of course - god, I hope he can't speak English!" Well, even if he could, our banter was sufficiently muted to keep us out of danger. But really..... this was one of the least impressive musical performances I've ever seen in this town - his guitar technique was minimal, and his singing...... well, it wasn't great. Shortly afterwards, I observed to Tulsa (who had - wisely, as it turned out - decided on an early night), via the much safer medium of text message, that, "This guy should only be allowed to sing in the shower. With Zyklon B at the ready." A harsh judgement, certainly; but, in the circumstances, justified, I think. I suppose I had by that stage exhausted my reserves of Christmas cheer......

The second chap on was rather better. Well, slightly. He was much more up-tempo, and had a much beefier sound (courtesy of the Jiangjinjiu's boss joining him on his drum-kit). There was some aggression and humour about his performance, too. But again, his singing wasn't the best. Hard to pigeonhole his style - I ventured to The Chairman that he came across as "a bastard son of Sid Vicious and Yoko Ono".

Ah, what laughs!

I could really do with seeing a good gig again soon, though - this holiday week has been something of a cultural desert. Our favourite Mongolian folkies ('throaties'), Hanggai, are supposed to be playing 3J tomorrow. We shall see. I wouldn't place any bets on it. But Tulsa and The Man In Black are both keen, so I suppose I'll check it out.

2 comments:

Froog said...

Bother - I had been told by text-message that Hanggai were just starting their third set at around 11.45 (which is how it usually goes there), so I dashed over from the Pool Bar (as it happens, I was already on my way and was there within a few minutes), but.... well, it seems that the message had been held up in the system for half an hour or so.... and the Mongolian boys weren't in the mood for playing late last night.

Rather vexing - but at least I caught their last song.

Froog said...

Saturday night was better - Li Tieqiao, the jaw-droppingly accomplished, stupendously innovative sax player from Glorious Pharmacy was playing with a couple of his mates (and the boss on drums again). 15-20 minute improvisations(?) with funky slap-bass and prog-rock guzheng - mind-blowing stuff.