Countdown to oblivion

As I fleetingly mentioned the other day, I had thought that my life was about to end this evening. In fact, I have one more week to 'put my affairs in order'.

The Barman has had The Ultimate Party Idea - and he has, amazingly, persuaded his bosses at Room 101 to put it into action. They are going to have a Jack Daniel's night. Beautifully simple! Why did no-one ever think of this before??

I love Jack. (I went on a pilgrimage to the famous distillery in Lynchburg, Tennessee with my gadfly commenter, The British Cowboy, a few years ago. 'Pilgrimage' is not too grand a word: I felt a reverence, a quivering sense of transcendence I have never experienced in a church.)

I especially love Jack when it's being sold at 5 kuai a shot (not much above cost!), which is to be the gimmick for this night of nights.

The supplementary stroke of genius is the competition: a free bottle of JD to be given to the lady wearing the shortest skirt that evening (or perhaps - even more devious - to the gentleman bringing the lady with the shortest skirt). I hope I can persuade a few of my gal pals to take on this challenge (though I daresay - as the ladies tend to be strangely immune to the charms of Mr Daniel's fine sipping whiskey - I shall have to stand them a significant number of mojitos or V&Ts or a bottle or two of Gordon's gin in order to secure their co-operation and have a chance of walking away with the prize bottle). It should be quite a night.

However, the somewhat odd decision has been taken to stage this event on a Thursday. Perhaps they were worried about the event being too popular and the place being trashed if they did it on the weekend. Or perhaps they just didn't want to cut across their regular live music nights on Friday and Saturday. It's a bit of a mystery. But..... for happy-go-lucky freelancers like me who can unilaterally decide not to work on Friday, this is no discouragement. And I think I'll be able to round up a fair contingent of reckless party animals who will be prepared to endure one day of hangover-at-work (or pull a 'sickie').

Yes, this hedonistic extravaganza - hastily put together - was originally slated for tonight..... but I think they realised that there hadn't really been any opportunity for the word to get around, so it has now been fixed for next week, the 17th.

I am counting the days, counting the hours.

So long, it's been nice knowing all of you.